Mental Wellness Challenge, 2021, July 05
HOT – REALLY HOT – TOO HOT…
Last week I challenged you to:
- Clean your windows… (figuratively or actually or both). Get a clear view of what’s outside. Take some time to take notice of what’s on the other side of your “window”. I’ve got a big window that is going to get cleaned the moment I am done with this post…
- Give yourself some love. If that means cutting yourself some slack – do that, if that means holding yourself a little more accountable, do that – but show yourself some love.
- Talk to a friend of family member, be open with them, tell them what they mean to you, let them know the importance they have in your life.
On cleaning my windows – Yup – got right to it… the actual ones for certain… I have a couple of big windows that tend to attract bird strikes… and they need cleaning more often than our others… so I did… and – sure enough… I had no sooner put the window washing supplies away when a Eurasian Ring Necked Dove took a “beaker” into the window – leaving wing marks and a smudge on my clean window… oh well – such is life…
I run into the same things when I clean my figurative windows too. Clean up my view of the world, wash off all the muck and smears from the lens that I peer out to the world through… and it doesn’t ever seem to take too long for something to get smucked up against my view. I find that if I do a better job at keeping my view cleared of all the mess – I tend to be generally more content… Having the poo on the looking glass draws my view away from the wonderful things in my experience.
I put some effort in with the “LOVE” piece. In some instances I gave myself some room and in other places I forced myself to tighten up a bit more. I tend to have issues with priorities… I get honed in on some “issue” or “set of expectations” that really don’t mean much of anything in the big picture… and I lose perspective on many of the items in my life that actually have more meaning. I worry about things I can’t change instead of investing energy in changing the things that I can… I know this isn’t just a me thing… that lots of folks experience the same issue…
I worked at being gentle with myself too… that’s a piece of self care, self love that I know I need to be more aware of.
I’m starting to feel a little better and I feel like I need to be doing this, doing that, getting this mountain cleared up, and on and on… then I remember direction that my coach used to give me – “YOU NEED TO PLAY MORE…” and sincerely – I’ve not really been feeling well enough to do much of anything – so now that I do feel more like getting at stuff – I am keeping R&R in mind as a requirement too… (Ah… maybe when things cool off a little… man its hot out there….)
I didn’t really take time over the last week to have a good talk with a family member… not sure why – just haven’t – and I will have to make sure that I carry this piece of my challenge forward for next week.
I’m pretty open with my spouse – I make a point of telling her that I love her every day – in as many different ways as I can manage… from a stroke on the cheek, to leaving her a note in the morning, to sharing a laugh over QI (a show from England we watch together) to washing or drying the dishes… lots of different ways of communicating that I care for certain… I just didn’t take time to have a good “check-in” type catch up.
This week I’d like to share about the struggling… Which struggle – any and all of them. I’ve always found that there is a real benefit to me – in my experience – with struggle. I struggle with lots of different things… some easy, some not – but in pretty much all cases – I recognize the benefit of the struggle.
What do I mean by “benefit in the struggle”… well – When I have to work hard to achieve a goal, I tend to harvest more from the task. An example of this is my trades training. I had to work super hard to do well in trades school… I invested mountains of time “LEARNING” the material. I didn’t just study for an exam – I did my best to learn the material so that it was part of my understanding. This struggle has benefitted me countless times in my teaching career. I had to figure stuff out… and now I can use my hard earned understanding to help my students learn the materials…
Investing in thrashing my way from a “want” for understanding and a “got it” is getting to be more of a chore as I get older… I don’t think this is anything special for me – I think its something that happens to most, if not all folks as we age.
I encounter other types of struggle as well. I’m a helper… If I see someone doing their own struggling, I tend to feel a real need to step right in and offer a hand, advice, assistance and the like. This is a struggle of my own – to allow the struggling I see in others – well – happen. I have a bad habit of thieving the struggle from people. Many of those folks thank me for helping them out – but I am always left thinking – “Would it have been better to have let them struggle through and figure it out on their own?” I don’t know for certain…
Then there’s the struggle that I wish I could carry for others – but simply can’t. It seems that I have into another cycle where there are folks in my experience that are faced with their mortality. This always seems to come in clusters for some reason. Anyway – while I would love to be able to carry some of their struggle – some of their burden – life isn’t like that… and most of the time – words just don’t have much in the way of impact on those situations.
Ya, ya – the struggle is real… good or bad, easy or hard (I just thought – can there be an easy struggle??)… there is value in the working through to get to the destination… I suppose – I could say that life is, in itself, a struggle. There are certainly days in my experience that are much more of a struggle than others.
COVID has been a hard thing for everyone. The virus has certainly changed my experience and the lives of the folks that are in my circle. BUT – there’s been some good that comes out of the struggle too! One piece that has had more attention shone on it because of COVID and its impact on society is the prominence of mental health struggles in the population. I believe there has been an increased acceptance of the presence of mental health issues – globally – as a result of the pandemic. I only hope that this increased awareness only grows…
Well – I’m struggling to get my thoughts out of my head and on to the page – so I think I am going to leave this here for now.
My challenge for you this week is to:
- BE KIND.
- Be appreciative of the differences in the needs of others. We are all on different paths.
- Practice patience. (I REALLY HAVE TO PRACTICE at patience lately…)
That’s it – I challenge you!